Danielle Peterson

I love being in the kitchen. I know that’s an unpopular thing to say as a women of my generation these days. But it’s true. I really do love being in the kitchen. I think cooking and baking for the people I love- for me anyways- is not only a form of relaxation and me-time, but it’s also one of the ways I show love for those I care about.

Making food is one of those things that require focus and concentration at some times, and at others allows me time to think and sort through feelings as I stir a pot or wait for a dish in the oven.

Cuisine at my house as a child was an expression of love and a way of connection for me. I can’t remember the number of times that I played sous-chef to my father, trailing after him from one project to another like a little duck, absorbing all I could of his tips and knowledge. Or how I watched my mother turn whole wheat into fresh ground flour and then fill our kitchen with the comforting scent of fresh, warm, homemade bread. It all felt like magic to me; taking simple ingredients and turning them into show-stopping masterpieces.

I remember I would always suck the air out of the bread bags for her as she plopped a loaf in at a time to share with relatives and friends. The smell of that warm, wholesome bread smell as I inhaled the air from each bag was intoxicating.

Even with my extended family and in-laws, certain baked goods and meals are a matter of family culture and tradition.

At our wedding, we even tried to honor that tradition by having a cherished family dessert recipe from Ben’s side and one from mine to represent our families at the reception.

I loved the idea then, and still do, of cooking for a family, gathering our future children around the dinner table and sharing our lives and stories with each other as we fill ourselves on a homemade meal with family tradition and heritage mixed in.

And while food still brings a deep sense of heritage and tradition..As I’ve gotten older I have realized that some of my habits in the kitchen aren’t as helpful as they once had been.

I have a flair, sometimes, for the extravagant when it comes to cooking. I think it comes from wanting to prove myself in the kitchen at home- showing my parents that I had listened to their lessons and could match their talent and abilities.

In some ways I think it was a competition; and it was also, still, a means of connection to my parents over our shared family culture and love of wonderful foods.

This has meant that some of my choices prioritized flavor and abundance over health- A choice that, while fun for certain occasions, wasn’t really sustainable as a lifestyle.

I started to notice my health being affected in a big way. I gained several extra pounds, and began to feel generally terrible all the time. I started getting heartburn, which had never been a struggle for me before, and I was much less physical than I’d ever been in my life because of how I was feeling.

I needed to make some changes.

So I began a journey of prioritizing my health first, instead of the emotional pleasures I associated with food- connection, family, prestige, togetherness. I needed a fresh start.

I don’t mean to advertise any particular diet plan or way of getting healthy. I am no expert in those things, and generally feel that most “fad diets” can be almost just as harmful as not eating well in the first place.

But at this point in my life I needed a structured hand to guide me, and what I found to work for me was the Dukan Diet, which I found praised by one of my inspirations- the lovely Kate Middleton.

I figured if she could have three children and still not only look like a model, but live a lifestyle of health and wellness, I thought I would give it a try. Plus, I figured any diet that a royal was using was sure to have been vetted by a team of professional nutrition advisors, right?

I can’t be sure on that part, but it gave me confidence enough to test it out. Plus the author was French, so I had a soft spot there, and a respect for French cuisine and healthy lifestyle culture.

With the Dukan diet, I went cold turkey for a short time, cutting myself off completely from the idea of food as something decadent and extravagant to focusing completely on the nutritional value that food provided my body. I didn’t count calories or starve myself, but for the first time in a long time I concentrated on giving my body what it needed instead of just whatever I wanted in the moment.

As the months went on, my body began to heal and change. But more importantly, my mind and my relationship to food got a detox as well. Instead of eating emotionally or using food as a connector, I started eating intentionally, listening to my body and rebuilding that relationship and trust that I had lost with myself.

I found myself becoming more active and making healthier lifestyle choices in other areas as well.

I started taking my dog on more walks, going to the gym with my husband, and playing tennis again- something I haven’t done consistently since childhood.

My relationship with myself improved and my confidence with my husband and others increased too.

Now, as I am entering the third stage of the four part diet, I feel like a new person. I trust myself now to exercise constraint and self-discipline in a way I never had before. And I am excited by the idea of continuing changes in my diet and nutritional journey; using healthier methods and ingredients to enjoy the more decadent things in moderation instead of emotional excess.

I still love food, in all its luxurious beauty. But now I love it for what it really fills me with instead of how it makes me feel.

I will always be a foodie, but I’ve learned better ways of doing it that truly nourish and sustain me instead of weighing me down and holding me back.

I feel so grateful for what this journey is teaching me, and who I am becoming- inside and out- as a result of the efforts I’ve been making.

I now feel a hunger not just for gratifying foods, but for life as well and the dreams and goals that I have for it.

I feel like the changes and sacrifices I have made are propelling me forward into the life that I wanted, making my dreams feel more and more attainable as I go.

So I guess, if you are feeling the same way that I was, don’t wait for life to get easier before you do something about it. Doing something about it is what will make life a little easier. Because life is too short to delay taking care of ourselves and filling our lives with people and things that truly nourish and are good for us.

And what better time is there than now?

DP